slow transformation...

I have never been a great cook, simple, not-so-sweet, fact!!!

I have never enjoyed anything associated with the process of cooking... grocery shopping, dishes, etc!

**

Once, when Savannah was little, she said, "mommy, you must really love us!" I asked what helped her know this... she simply stated, "cause I know how much you hate to cook and yet you do it for us all the time." What a sweet statement from my sweet daughter, but I had a twinge of regret that she was so VERY aware of my dislike to cook.

So, with this new beautiful home, with its wonderful appliances and conveniences... I have hoped that I would embrace this very important task.

So I have set the goal to shop weekly, to be sure and keep fresh ingredients more abundantly handy, and in the spring we will plant our first REAL garden and we will be getting chickens.

Fresh, yummy ingredients helps the creativity when it comes to cooking, FOR SURE!

And I have organized my recipes, rotating them often, cooking and then freezing many items like hamburger, etc, to help with prep times.

Do I dare say I am a changed woman?

I am still using the same pots and pans that my MIL gave us for a wedding gift, and hope to trade them in for new ones, but even until then... I have found contentment.

Hopefully not to late!

Now I enjoy making bread, canning, and creating in the kitchen.

Maybe I looked at cooking wrong all those years. It wasn't entertaining enough, it was monotonous, daily....

Yet, isn't it the simplest form of service, genuine, simple....for my most favorite people?!

***

I love books of poetry by Gunilla Norris,

especially her book Being Home that beautifully ponders on everyday tasks...

Cooking

Measuring, pouring, stirring, folding,

shaping, baking, peeling, cutting,

frying, turning, slicing, serving.

These are words I cook with.

They are all motion, all process.

I know as I create this meal

there is another cooking going on.

It, too, is all motion, all process-

an inner transformation.

Help me to give myself away

as easily as this carrot, this new potato.

I want my layers to peel away like the onion's.

I want to be as empty and clean

as the universe in a sweet green pepper

with its white star seeds.

I want. I want. In the heat of Your will

help me to give up wanting!

I am so full of urgency, expectation, image,

I make myself spiritually hungry. You are here,

therefore, there is everything to recieve.

With this daily bread I am fed.